My (Academic) Year of NO

A few years ago, yet another gem from Shonda Rhimes emerged on the literary scene: Year of Yes! I LOVE(d) this book and gifted it to a few friends. I loved the concept of saying yes to more, to taking risks, to stepping out of and away from our comfort zones. For much of my academic journey up until this point, I’ve wholeheartedly embraced years of YES!

I wanted a tenure track position so I said YES to the move to Wilmington. This also meant moving full speed ahead into life as a college professor: significant modifications to courses I was teaching, as well as a willingness to teach and design new courses; a consistent focus on research, which meant embracing new collaborations, publishing and mentoring students on their research, as well as my own; and intentional service, which meant local, statewide and national appointments for me. I taught, I wrote and conducted research with abandon (comparable to working at a medium sized R2 teaching institution), and I explored service with and to various agencies.

I wanted to embrace what it meant to live and work abroad so I said YES to six months in the U.K. at a sister institution.

I wanted to deepen my faith so I said YES to a few years of really intense study, fellowship and walking along-side faith-based communities.

I wanted to open my heart to romantic love and partnership so I said YES to dating apps, revisiting fractured connections and going deeper into my own healing in hopes of being a more compassionate partner.

I wanted to experiment with teaching grad students (my job exclusively focuses on undergrad education) so I said YES to a few part time teaching contracts that allowed me to test the waters.

I LOVE mentorship and wanted to give back to an organization that served as my lifeline during my first year years on the tenure track so I said YES to becoming a coach for the National Center for Faculty Development and Diversity’s (NCFDD) Faculty Success Program (FSP).

I said YES to new friendships. YES to community engagement. YES to podcasts and freelance writing. YES to speaking engagements. YES to becoming a small business owner. YES to a month in Uganda, East Africa. YES to new travel buddies. YES! YES! YES!

And these last few years have yielded a harvest more abundant than I could have ever imagined. I’ve written more, spoken more, traveled more in the last six years than I have in a LONG time. I’ve met more people and experimented with more romantic, as well as platonic, relationships since undergrad. I am grateful!

BUT as I move into my 7th year at my academic home, I’m embracing the notion of a year of NO. NO to new research endeavors, beyond what I’ve committed to. NO to other and external teaching endeavors. NO to unsolicited speaking and writing projects. NO to new friendships, new partnerships … new connections. New attachments.

And while this notion originally felt so good in my spirit, I know this extreme response leaves NO room for awe, wonder and amazement. So instead I am saying NO to any and every thing, person and place that does feel utterly amazing to me! If it doesn’t feel like a cool rain drop on an hot a?$ summer day in North Carolina, I don’t want it. If it doesn’t feel like butterflies in my stomach and affirming conversions and intentional growth ALONGSIDE rest, I don’t want it. If it doesn’t feel like love, peace, ease, and JOY I don’t want it.

So this is my year of NO … unless … [insert smile]. What year is it for you?